4 Ways To Avoid The Marriage Rut Kids Cause

As a parent, nothing is more important than your children. That’s how it should be! The moment you become a parent, you have a responsibility to give your kids everything they need. Your love should be unselfish and pure. Even so, today we’re going to look at one of the few times you should be selfish.

Your children may be the new loves in your life, but you had a love before them, remember? Through the busy life of parenthood, it’s important you don’t forget to show love to the person by your side. And, it’s not entirely selfish, either. Ensuring your home life is a happy one is a part and parcel of keeping your children happy!

Think about it, when was the last time you and your spouse gave each other attention? If you’re anything like most parents, you’re so tired when the kids go to bed that you don’t speak. It’s no surprise. Life is tiring enough, and every spare moment you have is spent with the kids.

Unfortunately, neglecting your marriage can lead to significant issues. So, how can you breathe the heart back into your marriage? The key is to put a little effort in! These suggestions should get you on the right track.

BE ON THE SAME PARENTING PAGE

Okay, this is about your spouse, not your children. Being on the same parenting page is a sure way to keep you together as a team. Chances are, you already have the same values. You had children together, didn’t you? Even so, issues can arise that neither of you will have foreseen.

It’s important you talk things through before making major decisions. This will ensure you don’t undermine each other without meaning to. That’s not to say you need to call on each other every time you’re deciding a punishment. But, it’s worth sending your children to their room before deciding what you’re going to do about the issue. That way, you can make sure you both agree and think things through properly.

If you disagree on a matter, it’s important you stay calm. It’s easy for things to heat up when talking about children. Don’t let them! You should both express your feelings, and see if you can reach a compromise.

SPEND TIME AWAY FROM THE KIDS

You won’t be able to rekindle your romance if you’re around the children all the time. And no, the evenings, when they’re in bed, don’t count! If you think it would help (and it probably will), set aside a date night once a month. Ask family members if they could watch the children, or find a babysitter you can count on. Then, make plans with your spouse.

Treat this like the early days of your marriage again. Make an effort to buy a new outfit and get yourself looking beautiful. Plan what you would like to do together. Even going out for a nice meal will make a huge difference. It’ll also help your mental health to have some time in adult company with no children to worry about!

TREAT EACH OTHER

Chances are, you treat your children a lot. But, do you both remember to treat each other? If not, it’s time to start. Buying gifts for the person you love is a fantastic way to show them you were thinking of them. It’ll add a little touch of sparkle back into your marriage. 

Remember that this isn’t about the amount of money you spend. Try to find gifts with meaning that won’t break the bank. It can be hard to get back into the habit when you haven’t done it in a long time. Get an idea of gifts for the man who has everything to get you started.

Don’t talk to your man about this. Just start buying him little treats. Chances are, he’ll start doing the same. Putting this small effort into each other will play a big part in bringing you closer.

KEEP INTIMACY ALIVE IN YOUR MARRIAGE

After you’ve been married 14 years or more, intimacy often becomes a thing of the past. And no, we’re not suggesting you jump into bed with your spouse. Though, if you want to, do it!

In truth, though, intimacy is about more than that. When you stop making an effort at physical contact, it’s easy to become emotionally distant, too. Even touching your spouse on the arm, or kissing them when they walk into a room, can keep that intimacy alive.