You deserve to be in a loving, respectful relationship. We all do. The thing is, though, many of us only focus on the loving part, or at least the “relationship” part. We are so focused on being in a relationship that we often look past things like what we deserve and how we are treated to maintain that relationship status. Never forget that you deserve to be respected and cared for in a relationship. You never deserve anything less than that. If, however, you find yourself dealing with disrespect in a relationship, you need to choose to respect yourself and change what is happening.
Things that are disrespectful in a relationship
Being disrespected can be soul-crushing, especially when it comes from someone that you love and someone that you work hard to make happy. Recognize your worth and recognize that you deserve more.
Just know that you don’t need to spend your life being treated poorly. There are things that you can do to make it better, to make sure that you are no longer being disrespected.
Signs of lack of respect in a relationship
When you are in an emotionally abusive relationship where you are being disrespected, it can be challenging to recognize the signs of it.
- If your partner is treating you in a way that you wouldn’t treat others, pay attention.
- If your partner does or says things to you that make you feel bad about yourself, pay attention.
- If your partner is disregarding your feelings, pay attention.
Once you realize that you are being disrespected, have a sit-down, serious conversation with your partner about the issue and how you are feeling about it. You deserve to share your feelings, and someone who loves you will listen to what you are saying.
It is important to be direct and forthcoming about the disrespect you are receiving. No holding back during this honest heart-to-heart.
Offer the benefit of the doubt
If you see slightly disrespectful signs, give your partner the respect of telling him or her how they are making you feel. Maybe they had a bad day and snapped at you, or perhaps you offended them somehow, and that is their retort, or it may be something that they don’t even realize they are doing.
None of these are acceptable excuses, but these are also things that can easily be talked out and changed.
Also, pay attention to whether or not this is consistent behavior. If it’s a one-time thing, then you probably have nothing to worry about (although you still need to talk). If you find that it happens consistently, this is more of a concern.
Give yourself some space
Like with any other conflict in a relationship, it is important to give yourself space. Treat yourself to some self-care, or take a couple of days away.
This is an excellent way for you both to self-reflect on your relationship. This self-reflection is great for both of you, especially if you are the type of couple who spends most of your time together.
Don’t react in kind
Like with most other negative things, don’t react to their disrespect with disrespect from you. Don’t stoop to that level. You are better than that. You deserve a relationship that is more fulfilling than that.
Get better at saying no
If you don’t want to do something, say so. For many of us (especially women), we often have a hard time saying no to things.
We feel obligated to do things even if we don’t want to. The more you say no to things we don’t want, the more confident you will be saying no to being treated poorly.
Stand up for yourself in the moment
Yes, you need to take the time to have a serious conversation, but it is equally important to stand up for yourself in the moment. If your partner does or says something that makes you feel disrespected, tell them right then and there. It’ll often shock them enough to shut them up and make them listen.
Sometimes people change for the better, and that is wonderful. Sometimes, they don’t. If you have communicated with your partner about how you are feeling and they continue to disrespect you, respect yourself enough to leave. You deserve more. You deserve constant respect.