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You’ve probably heard that emotionally responsive parents are crucial for a child’s well-being. What does it mean to you to be a good father? Our culture idolizes the muscular guy who doesn’t crumble under duress. Anger appears to be the most appropriate emotion to express. What did you see as a child?
Many of us had fathers who instructed us what to do and didn’t listen to our complaints. Some of us had never heard our male relatives express fear, feel vulnerable, or confess a mistake. Perhaps affection was a little more subtle and difficult to sense.
However, the modern-day man no longer wants to suppress their feelings and live as an emotionally unavailable being. This article discusses some of the past behaviors that fathers had and how you can address these toxic traits. Read on to find out more.Kids are thirsty for affirmation from their parents, whom they view as heroes. Here are some tips on how to be a more supportive father!Click To Tweet
Men Prefer to Keep their Emotions Hidden Because They Were Raised by Emotionally Unavailable Parents
Men are more likely than women to experience chronic emotional unavailability. This is primarily due to deeply established societal notions of masculinity. This makes it more difficult for males to develop emotional intelligence.
Although identity has grown more fluid and expansive in the twenty-first century, “old school” masculine ideology remains firmly entrenched in American culture.
The fundamentals of qualifying as “masculine” entail not being a “sissy” (crying, expressing fear, not taking chances), attempting to acquire respect through financial/career successes, and never admitting vulnerabilities.
Emotionally distant fathers are likely to have learned “how to be a man” from their own emotionally absent fathers.
How they Express Strong Emotions
Men may transform what they perceive to be “feminine” emotions into more acceptable masculine sentiments instead of vocally conveying their feelings.
For example, a guy may not express grief when grieving the death of a family member who died unexpectedly. Instead, he remains stoic for the first several days before lashing out furiously at their child or wife.
Children frequently characterize their fathers as workaholics who are emotionally distant. Working 10 or 12 hours each day when it isn’t required is one method to avoid building warm, intimate relationships.
Workaholic fathers rationalize their intense dread of emotional connection by convincing themselves that they are merely “providing for their family,” as men are expected to do.
Maintaining a Physical Connection
Emotionally absent dads frequently claim that they’re always present for their children since they came back from work each day, ate dinner together as a family, and spent weekends at home performing required tasks.
Kids may see an emotionally distant father physically present in the house all of the time, but this does not compensate for the absence of an emotionally accessible father.
Possibility of Men Making Healthy, Emotional Connections
Thankfully, many guys are daring to deviate from the tough-guy image. We all lose out if we perceive males as emotionally detached providers! A guy may appear tough in everyday settings, but he will rise to the occasion when faced with an emotional struggle.
The good news is that children flourish, particularly if their dads become more receptive to their ideas and feelings. Open, emotional support parenting is crucial for raising secure, self-sufficient children who are confident in their abilities to achieve.
Give Your Kids Emotional Support to Bridge the Gap
Fathers may struggle to overcome their incapacity to build deep, loving connections with their kids and daughters. What happens if your child screams for sweets or your six-year-old is jumping off the walls, thrilled and loud? What should you do if your four-year-old son is terrified of the monster beneath the bed?
Shouldn’t you be imposing boundaries and asserting your authority? When there is so much emotion going on, it might be challenging to know what to do!
Helping children discover language for their feelings is one example of supportive parenting. Naming feelings of irritation, excitement, or anxiety, for instance, is an important aspect of assisting your kid in exploring their experience.
One way of building this connection slowly is by engaging your child in an activity that both of you might enjoy. Try making something together, engaging in fun activities the kids love. For example, you can install and build stuff like a caged fish farming dock for your fish farm if you run one.
How and Emotionally Present Father-Child Relationship Builds Resilience
Dads have a unique ability to affect how their children learn to explore and interact with others. According to current fathering studies, “fathers have a particularly important role in building social skills and the potential for healthy connections in their children.”
For example, a father’s assistance in assisting children in confronting difficult or new situations might encourage “safe exploration.” A father’s emotional presence also aids the child’s neurological system in forming pathways and connections that aid in the relief of suffering.
With stable attachment, areas of the brain that ease emotion, elicit empathy, and ignite intuition become stronger. That is how emotional connection with parents helps children develop the healthy reactions they require to live and thrive, both independently and in the company of others.
Sensitive parenting promotes well-being by fostering stable bonding.
The Bottom Line: An Emotional Connection with Parents is Very Important
Sensitive parenting may entail bouncing up and down for a few minutes with the six-year-old or bringing her out to play. Emotionally responsive parenting may need a leap of imagination, such as inquiring about what the monster under the bed does for pleasure, its favorite snack, or whether it will fall asleep during the bedtime tale.
What is the benefit of being such an emotionally invested parent? Emotionally responsive parenting provides children with a feeling of well-being and stability. We hope the read was informative and wish you the best in being an emotionally present father and husband.
Do you know how to heal from emotionally unavailable parents?
Krystle Cook – the creator of Home Jobs by MOM – put her psychology degree on a shelf and dived into a pile of diapers and dishes instead. She is a wife and mother to two rambunctious boys, sweating it out in her Texas hometown. She loves cooking, DIY home projects, and family fun activities.