Note: This article contains affiliate links (hyperlinks, widgets, or through images), which means I receive compensation if you purchase a product through them. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and/or believe will add value to my readers. Visit my disclosure page for more information.
Preparing For Another Child
Telling your older child your pregnant can be a daunting task. Say it the wrong way and all hell can break loose but say it the right way and they will be anxiously counting down the days.
Sharing the Good News
Tell your older child that you are are going to have a new baby early in your pregnancy. You don’t want them to overhear the news accidentally and start the journey on a bad note. However, try not to talk too much about the baby, at first, because most children’s first reaction is jealousy. You don’t want them to think “mom is having another baby and she doesn’t need me anymore”. The “baby” topic definitely shouldn’t be the only thing you are discussing at home. That can get old real quick.
Pregnancy Isn’t An Excuse
If you are having a hard pregnancy and feel sick or are too tired play with your older child, don’t ever say it’s because of the baby. That will quickly make your older child feel resentment towards the younger one even before it’s born. If you feel sick, tell the child that you are tired and you need some rest. This is also a good time for your husband to have some one on one time with your older child. If you normally do everything for your child make the switch to daddy as fun as possible. You want the change to feel like a reward, not as a punishment.
Questions About Your Pregnancy
If your child asks where babies come from, be as brief as possible. If they are still young say something like the baby is growing in mommy’s tummy and when it is large enough it will come out so you can hold it. Do not explain more than you have been asked. So, in this sense – if the child is not asking any questions, don’t start explaining anything. Do not lie. Use simple words and do not go into any details.
Your Older Child Hates The Idea Of A New Baby
Sometimes children hate the idea of a new baby. They will tell you they don’t want it or even try to convince you that YOU don’t need it. This reaction is pretty normal and natural for young children.
If your child has a negative reaction, tell them that they don’t have to love or take care of the baby. Be prepared to live through your own little piece of hell, if the older child starts to act hostile. Don’t be mad. Instead, try to understand that they are acting this way because they are scared and confused.
Can’t Wait To Be A Big Brother Or Sister
Children are very intuitive. Many will react positively about the good news just to make you happy. And still, remember that no matter how happy the older child seems to be, they need to be reassured that mom and dad will always be mom and dad. No matter what. Play with your child, go out together and only talk about the baby if they bring it up.
Krystle Cook – the creator of Home Jobs by MOM – put her psychology degree on a shelf and dived into a pile of diapers and dishes instead. She is a wife and mother to two rambunctious boys, sweating it out in her Texas hometown. She loves cooking, DIY home projects, and family fun activities.